Poe Intro: Metaphor Style
July 03 2008 01:59 PM -- Filed in: Poe McNoe
I wanted to start off by thanking Massey for bringing
me aboard the immensely popular, ridiculously
entertaining Buckeye Commentary. At first I had fears
that my style of writing (the style where there is no
style) would ruin or degrade the product that Keith
created and that Massey is building on. I had no idea
where to start when he asked me to contribute my
first post to BC, since everything previously was
just random odds and ends off the top of my head.
Then I thought to myself that it would be a perfect article if I were to pick up where the last 2 seasons left off and dedicate my first post to the National Championship Games against Florida and LSU. It would be perfect: Such a hot topic would draw the ire of some readers and inspire others. I wanted to complain, compare and analyze.
So I sat down and started planning out the first article. Some of you may know me from the blog JimTresselsHead, where I would make color commentary about everything from SEC/CBS to recruiting. That’s all I’d ever known and that’s what I was (reasonably) good at. So I started writing and posted my first article for Buckeye Commentary and it was garbage. Just bad. It was an awesome read for a couple sentences, where I bashed the SEC, but then it turned on me. I was embarrassed. I had misspelled words, run on sentences, and I just made up some words along the way because I thought I could and I thought it would work. It didn’t. Rather than my world-renowned sarcasm and spite for anything not Buckeye related, I decided to analyze the game rather than just say whatever I wanted. I tried to break down the numbers, give reasons why certain things weren’t working. I tried to be someone else, I tried to be Massey, and I wasn’t. The part that was so upsetting to me was that I knew I messed up halfway through article. I knew it, and I continued to write like a mad man with no rhythm or reason. That wasn’t me. I thought I was ruined and that I would never get another opportunity.
Nobody believed in me after that. Everyone said my writing wasn’t even in the same class as edsbs.com or mgoblog.com. But then my reader base grew and I gained more and more confidence in my writing style and what I was writing about. Everything was going great and I was even getting comments on my posts, some good ('Great post') and some bad ('You suck'), which is exactly how I like it. In fact, I was doing so well that Massey wanted to give me another shot at Buckeye Commentary. He said he believed in me and that I’d bring an edge to the blog that he sorely needed. He told me to submit a post.
So you know what I did? I submitted the same exact post as before. Sure I edited it by running spell check, but you and I both know that doesn’t catch everything. It was the same damn post as I had written before, but I changed some words around, capitalized and underlined some, and that was that. I figured that even though it didn’t work the first time, maybe it would work the second time. It didn’t. I knew it wasn’t what I was good at yet I thought, after all that time, Massey wouldn’t realize it was the same as the first. I even stuck a few paragraphs of German in there, because, well, I had been trying to learn it and I thought I knew it but it turns out I had no idea. It was posted and I thought I nailed the German, then all of my comments were from German people saying how much I butchered their language. I had no one to blame but myself. I don’t know why I thought it would work the second time around, because it was almost as bad as the first, but at least some of the words were spelled right.
Then I realized something. Starting off good = Ted Ginn and Beanie Wells? Misspelled Words = Blown Assignments? Run on Sentences = Third Down Conversions? German = 15 Yard Zone Coverage? Bad execution and bad game plans = Bad execution and bad writing plan? Sounds a little too familiar. What upset me the most was that I knew that wasn’t the real me writing those articles. I knew what I was good at and I refused to do it. Alas, so did the Buckeyes in 2006 and 2007.
In that case, let’s hope I have it figured out. You know, just in case Massey invites me back for a third time.
Then I thought to myself that it would be a perfect article if I were to pick up where the last 2 seasons left off and dedicate my first post to the National Championship Games against Florida and LSU. It would be perfect: Such a hot topic would draw the ire of some readers and inspire others. I wanted to complain, compare and analyze.
So I sat down and started planning out the first article. Some of you may know me from the blog JimTresselsHead, where I would make color commentary about everything from SEC/CBS to recruiting. That’s all I’d ever known and that’s what I was (reasonably) good at. So I started writing and posted my first article for Buckeye Commentary and it was garbage. Just bad. It was an awesome read for a couple sentences, where I bashed the SEC, but then it turned on me. I was embarrassed. I had misspelled words, run on sentences, and I just made up some words along the way because I thought I could and I thought it would work. It didn’t. Rather than my world-renowned sarcasm and spite for anything not Buckeye related, I decided to analyze the game rather than just say whatever I wanted. I tried to break down the numbers, give reasons why certain things weren’t working. I tried to be someone else, I tried to be Massey, and I wasn’t. The part that was so upsetting to me was that I knew I messed up halfway through article. I knew it, and I continued to write like a mad man with no rhythm or reason. That wasn’t me. I thought I was ruined and that I would never get another opportunity.
Nobody believed in me after that. Everyone said my writing wasn’t even in the same class as edsbs.com or mgoblog.com. But then my reader base grew and I gained more and more confidence in my writing style and what I was writing about. Everything was going great and I was even getting comments on my posts, some good ('Great post') and some bad ('You suck'), which is exactly how I like it. In fact, I was doing so well that Massey wanted to give me another shot at Buckeye Commentary. He said he believed in me and that I’d bring an edge to the blog that he sorely needed. He told me to submit a post.
So you know what I did? I submitted the same exact post as before. Sure I edited it by running spell check, but you and I both know that doesn’t catch everything. It was the same damn post as I had written before, but I changed some words around, capitalized and underlined some, and that was that. I figured that even though it didn’t work the first time, maybe it would work the second time. It didn’t. I knew it wasn’t what I was good at yet I thought, after all that time, Massey wouldn’t realize it was the same as the first. I even stuck a few paragraphs of German in there, because, well, I had been trying to learn it and I thought I knew it but it turns out I had no idea. It was posted and I thought I nailed the German, then all of my comments were from German people saying how much I butchered their language. I had no one to blame but myself. I don’t know why I thought it would work the second time around, because it was almost as bad as the first, but at least some of the words were spelled right.
Then I realized something. Starting off good = Ted Ginn and Beanie Wells? Misspelled Words = Blown Assignments? Run on Sentences = Third Down Conversions? German = 15 Yard Zone Coverage? Bad execution and bad game plans = Bad execution and bad writing plan? Sounds a little too familiar. What upset me the most was that I knew that wasn’t the real me writing those articles. I knew what I was good at and I refused to do it. Alas, so did the Buckeyes in 2006 and 2007.
In that case, let’s hope I have it figured out. You know, just in case Massey invites me back for a third time.
